Viewing entries tagged
rant

Forgiveness

Wrote this while on my flight...

Nearly a year ago, I made a decision that I thought was best for myself. Some of my closest friends really encouraged it to happen, others really didn’t know the situation but supported me anyways and those that were impacted just want what’s best. However a part of me feels like I made a mistake but another part of me is really proud of what has transpired. Overall, I owe it to myself to forgive myself and what has happened. I know that I can own up to my wrong doings as well as my own transgressions.

If you really care about someone but know that there isn’t anything you can do at that moment, is to let them go and hope one day they’ll come back or each other’s paths will cross again. There are so many things I want to say but just can’t seem to find the words to say it. Those friends who encouraged this are not surprised that I would fall back into a habit, but all they want for me is to be happy. A part of me isn’t happy about how things left, but another part of me is really glad it happened. Growing up is hard but no one ever said it was going to be easy.

This literally sounds like I’m just running around the issue and not facing it head on. But, what’s the point? I’ve said my peace and have tried to move on. Communication is a two way street, though I like taking the beaten path or at least a one way street. There is less to worry about but there is a lot of assumptions, misinformation and misconceptions. 

I guess what I’m trying to say is “I’m sorry,” I’m sorry to myself and I’m sorry to the situation. Am I mad that it happened, no, it has been a great time soul searching and really know what I want. So I guess what I want is forgiveness. I forgive myself but will I be forgiven for what has happened? Only time will tell and I just hope that I can just add this moment to another chapter of my life. 

Will I expect anything to come from this? No, but hopefully with me vaguely clearing the air, the message comes across to those loud and clear. If not, at least I can say that I’m happy with where I am and only hope for the best in others. Having hate is unnecessary energy and a waste of time. Value those who care about you and value them right back with the same if not more. Here’s hoping I’m valued because i know I value others and I do not like having hate towards others. 

On that note, I’m ready for my vacation and time away from the city!

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2015 New Year's Resolution

So keeping with my resolutions from the past few years, I'm adding some new ones.

1. Travel the world - I mentioned yesterday that I renewed my passport and I really want to explore the world...I'm 26, single and I haven't really seen the world except for the Philippines, Canada and the US.

Places I'd love to travel to
Europe - literally almost every country on the continent
Brazil - because I have friends from there
South Africa - one of my favorite artists is from here
Australia - I want to see the Outback, check out the Sydney Opera House and explore the island continent
New Zealand - visit Middle Earth lol
Japan - home of Pokemon
China - see the Great Wall, try and navigate through a place with over a billion people populating the country

2. Do some video blogging and start a podcast with a friend

3. Making mistakes, learning to forgive and letting go - So in keeping with ending the day on a positive note, I'm adding this as a self reminder that it's ok not to be perfect and it's the imperfections that makes us stronger.

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With these additions I'm optimistic 2015 will be a good year!

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Opportunities Abound

It's a new month and I'm really excited because I've just been working hard to pursue what I love and it's slowly coming together.

I'm part of an AMAZING organization, the Educational Theatre Association (EdTA) and this year I've finally paid my dues (literally) to become a professional member. I had been a part of the organization through the International Thespian Society as a Junior Thespian (Troupe #88331) and Thespian (#Troupe 6513). Now living in New York, I've been asked by the Chapter Directors of the state to be the new Student Thespian Officer (STO) Coordinator. Which I was thrilled to have been asked and honored to have been consider. I of course humbly accepted and now I'm getting to work with a great group of kids. Though I'm still relatively new to the role, I have plenty of leadership experience and hope that I can make an impact.

Also with the organization, since the National Festival, held every year at the University of Nebraska - Lincoln, I've been making a push to reach out to other state festivals/conferences to help out. I'm happy to say that I'll be getting to go to the Georgia Thespian Conference in February to teach Beginning Hip Hop. I'm really excited for the opportunity and it'll be my first time visiting the GA Thespian Conference. Hopefully this will be the beginning of more to come! Here's a link of me dancing during a Hip Hop Class at Alvin Ailey taught by David Terry to see my moves.

I also had the privilege last month to help out with Broadway Cares/Equity Fights Aids annual Flea Market. It was great getting to be a part of the event and help out! So many theatre goers at the event supporting the cause! Here's a pic from the event, where I was at the EdTA table along with this year's International Thespian Officers (ITO)

Last month I made my debut on a New York Theatre at The Flea Theatre performing in #serials@theflea in a show called, "A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Dragon," by A.J. Ditty. The best part of doing it was the show was selected to come back this month and I'll get to perform with it (hopefully) in two weeks. It just needs to survive this next week and I have a good feeling it will! The writing and the cast has been great! Plus the audience has been very receptive and loving it! However it will have to place in the top three against four other shows!



I've also been cast in another Flea Production in The Cutthroat Series: Grand Guignol Duels - Night Terrors in the show "The Blind." I'm excited for another great opportunity with this theatre community. I look forward to the rehearsals and the experience! 

Besides my theatre involvements, I've finished another year of blogging as a freelance writer for CBS Detroit for the show Big Brother. Now that it's been announced for two more season, only continues to fuel my desire to be on the show! But I'm thankful for the opportunity that I've had to write and even though I'm not getting paid for it, I'm doing it for the experience. Plus the byline isn't so bad as well as the exposure I've gotten. I love reading the comments (both positive, negative and random) as well as emails from fans of the show. I get into weekly conversations with a friend of mine who now lives in Canada about the show! Check out all my articles on CBS Detroit!

My job has been good too! I've been giving the opportunity to train the new hires as they start with the company. It's always great being able to mentor and resource for my new co-workers. Plus I'm thankful my job has been able to work with my passions of acting and be able to have a "survival job" and do what I love. 

This weekend I head back to Michigan (or home you could say) to be the photographer for a friend's wedding. I am honored and excited for this opportunity. This will be my third wedding I'll be photographing. I'm just hoping the rain won't be an issue as this will be my first outdoor wedding I'll be doing, but rain or shine I will be capturing the moments! I look forward to the challenge!



My "Dear Anonymous," post was very therapeutic and much needed. I was finally able to get all the emotions I wanted to get out. But it's shown me that it's ok to make mistakes, friends come and go as well as you can lose touch with some but then pick up where you left off. Ironically after I wrote that post I looked over it and thought, "Man this sounds like a good monologue," and laughed.

But keeping up with my New Year's Resolution, to always stay positive which hasn't been easy however many of my coworkers are annoyed with my positivity so I must be doing something right! 

All in all, NYC was the right decision. I may be working my butt off, but I know that with determination, drive and passion I can achieve my goals and dreams. Though it may be in a different form, I take all the experiences and learn something from them. Again trying to stay positive. Who wants to be sad and negative? I know I don't!

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A New Year's Resolutions

Happy New Year!

Although the last day of 2013 ended on a sour note, I'm feeling optimistic and positive about this year! Even though it's just another day, it's a new year and with a new year resolutions!

Last Year's Resolutions (& If I stuck to it):
1. Blog every day - whether it be a short or long or somewhere in between I shall blog. This will help me just look back at the day and to reflect. Plus I enjoy just rambling and a story usually ensues.
Now I definitely tried for the first few months but it just inevitably didn't last. 

2. Work Out  - Generic yes, but I shall stick with it. I did good the past few months so I'm going to continue with it. Luckily I am able to go to a gym that's near my work and where I live so I can't really complain about not having time when the gym is right there. Also when it gets warmer running outside
I had a good routine for a while, fell off then got back on but then fell off. 

3. Find someone - Let's be honest we all want to be in a relationship so I think this year will be a good year. Granted I've to stick myself out their and just go for it so we'll see how this one goes.
Tried, didn't happen.

4. Continue to pay debt - We all have bills and this isn't going away until it's all paid for. So good resolution right?!?
I actually did and still have debt but it's getting less!

5. Positivity - End the day on a good note as well as start the day with the expectation that it will be a good day. Trying not to let the negative get me down or stress me out.

I actually did this too! 
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What I learned from these resolutions, some were very overly ambitious but with a tweak or two here are my resolutions this year:

1. Continue to pay off debt - Since I deferred my student loan debt for a few months, I've increased some amount but it's not going to stop me from getting my debt paid off!

2. Positivity - Even though I don't acknowledge this everyday, I know that this has been a good resolution and nobody likes negative people, right? Right!

3. Be Healthy & Fit - Instead of committing to work out, I just want to be healthy and fit! So going to the gym will definitely be a part of this resolution but it's about feeling good about myself physically. 

4. Find someone - They're out there somewhere and it'll only happen if I just let it happen. So we'll again see how this year will go!

5. Blog when I want - I won't say everyday but when I want. If I feel inspired to blog I'll blog, but I'm not going to force myself to do it when I may just not feel like doing it. Blogging for me is a great way for me to express my thoughts and opinions. 

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Again Happy New Year!

Day 92

I am enjoying my day off today from work!

With my day off from work I am enjoying catching up on my reality tv shows!

Right now I am watching the following shows:
- Dancing With The Stars
- The Voice
- Big Brother Canada
- Project Runway

I was also watching The Face, but that ended and the winner for me was a slight surprise but it is what it is.

Dancing With The Stars is a show that I enjoy for the mere fact it's Dancing. The celebrity aspect is funny and my final three pics right now are

- Kellie & Derek
- Zendya  & Val
- Jacoby & Karina

however I would enjoy to see these people in the finals

- Zendya & Val
- Aly & Mark
- Victor & Lindsay

But I feel like it may be following

- Kellie & Derek
- Ingo & Kim
- Jacoby & Karina

As much as I enjoy Kellie Pickler, I cannot stand Derek Hough winning this freaking show series. I'm pretty sure his three time championships and five out of ten trips to the finals it's safe to say Derek has built a fan base. Also it doesn't hurt that his partner has just as much if not more of a fan base too. Ingo has a huge following with soap opera. I was surprised but then I had to really think about the demographic this show is trying to get it makes sense. However Jacoby is definitely a wild card but since he's a sports guy they attract fans and that will keep him safe.

I would personally like to see youth dominate this competition. Victor is a wild card, but I am a fan of Lindsay for the fact she was on So You Think You Can Dance. However with this demographic Youth has a slim to none chance! Why because they like seeing the underdogs win. But let's be honest, the youth is the underdogs, why not vote for them?!?! Alright off my soapbox...Zendya was a surprise this season. However she does hip hop so I was excited to hear about that since I enjoy hip hop dancing but I was surprised they were trying to get the Disney Channel viewers to watch, when those kids/demographic should be focusing on education or actually learning to dance. You'd think because she was an Olympian she'd be great, she's in my opinion not even close to where Shawn was but definitely has a lot of work ahead of her.

The Voice is getting good. I am enjoying Shakira & Usher joining the show! Adam and Blake are still good too for their little bromance segments. I'm surprised that they've been playing up the Latino Audiences with the multi-lingualness of Shakira. Spanish, Portuguese and English...I wish I could speak that many.

Right now here's how I rank the judges teams:

Team Adam
Team Shakira
Team Usher
Team Blake

Adam has a girl who sang with Michael Jackson and Adam is definitely taking a page from Blake last season and really playing on multiple genre artists. Not focusing too much on pop but actually going for a Voice. Which is smart. I enjoy Shakira's team it's very diverse and will play well with the Latino Audience. Usher is currently under the radar with his team but I won't be surprised if his team has many stand outs this season. Blake is playing to his country roots and if people know me I am not a fan of country. So obviously he's not in my top team but also he's kinda playing it safe with the artists he's been getting and selecting. I will be looking forward to the Knockout Rounds and possible steals!



Big Brother Canada (BBCA)!

For anyone who knows me, Big Brother is my guilty pleasure show! I LOVE this show! It's a great mix of the Real World (having strangers randomly picked to live in a house) and Survivor (Outwit, Outplay and Outlast)! The fact that Canada has been begging to get a show and they finally have one it's pretty cool to watch. Granted I am watching via internet but it's worth it! Plus BBCA really took the time to make sure their first season was great! And it's getting their...I'm not saying it's not great right now but it's becoming predictable. But that happens with every show. The producers can do only so much to appeal the the audience and to let the guinea pigs (the houseguests) do what they're doing.

So anyways my favorite players in the game are the ones who are actually playing. Do I like some of their moves, NO but they're playing the game AND/OR at least getting airtime. Which is the most important thing. If you're not getting airtime then you're doing something wrong. You're either playing too safe or your story isn't good enough to get you some camera time.

People playing the game:

- Gary
- Alec
- Peter

Floaters:
- Jillian
- Emmett
- Talla

Lost Causes
- Topaz
- Andrew

At first when I read about Gary, I wasn't on board, however seeing him play the game has surprised me. Alec & Peter our obvious game players and if the houseguests were smart enough vote them out. Gary is obviously on the chopping block, but I really like the message Gary is sending. However I think he's over doing it now with the dramatics. I'm glad he's calm down the glitter though. Jillian is supposedly a good player according to AJ but he got voted out and he had been a pawn for four evictions he got lucky his first three but the his last sealed the deal. But he's not going home just yet he's a Juror. Which I'm predicting a mellow jury, unlike Big Brother 14 here in the US. However Jillian is just boring to me, she's just canoodling with Emmett and I'm bored with her. Emmett lost his bromance Tom and he's just a lost duck and is just floating to whoever has power. Talla is just a wild card but she's floater at best. Unless she wins HOH she's no game player for me. But I do see her with a lot of potential since she's been close multiple times for HOH. So there is hope for her.

Peter said it best, Topaz should have kept her mouth shut and not kept yapping. However I LOVED this twist. It's brilliant, it's BIG BROTHER! I would hate to have that happen to me. But I know I probably would have done what Topaz did. Topaz though should always remember, (canada's motto) Big Brother is always watching! And to Expect the Unexpected (US BB motto). Andrew is an idiot. You put up Topaz because she put you up!?!? Typical move, why not have backdoor her. Then again she can take herself and Gary off the block. However if you wanted to make a big move, TAKE OUT ALEC & PETER! This is a game, yes, you'll lose numbers for putting them up but it's a week to week game. You can plan as much as you want far out but you need to throw some curve balls. But we'll see what happens. Plus the house flip flops day to day. So if Andrew wants Gary out he'll probably go out unless Topaz does something really stupid! But it definitely sucks if you're on the chopping block up with someone in your alliance. However you've got to look out for yourself! If they're out and you're safe then move on and play the game. Janelle is a great example. As many of her alliance members got voted off she continued to fight to win power. But she may be a great player she has yet to be a winner. I say that because let's be honest, we all know Janelle will probably be back in the BB US house one season. Maybe not this upcoming season but another. I just hope this next season they have some new blood, fresh faces and a DIVERSE CAST! Ok off my soapbox again sorry!




Project Runway - I didn't watch today but I already caught up so maybe another blog entry!


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Big Brother Season 14 Episode Nine

Here's a little snippet of what's to come for last night's episode breakdown. This time check out my "Floaters of Big Brother"


Floaters of Big Brother

Wil - He was saved this week and didn't do squat to really make an impact on this week's game. Even though he was in the POV competition, he was the second to get eliminated.
Ian - Either is really floating or playing a really good game. From my perspective, Ian is floating and listening maybe a bit too much to his coach or maybe not enough. Ian hasn't really talked strategy nor has he tried to make any alliances. So we'll see how much further he'll last.
Jenn - Another Boogie houseguest and I have yet to see how Jenn is playing the Big Brother game. The whole laying low strategy only goes so far and being noticed is a lot better than floating because they you'll either be considered a threat or making stupid moves. Either way you'll get people talking about you.

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Thoughts? Comments? Reactions? Let me know here or wait tomorrow as this will be posted at CBS Detroit's website!

Until then Here's the link

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Big Brother Season 14 Episode Eight


Here's the headers of my breakdown of Episode Eight, I've dubbed "All You Need Is One," which was said by Shane's Coach and former BB houseguest Britney. Here are the headlines I've coined during this episode breakdown.

"Power Drunk," "Shanielle Is In Full Effect," "Coaches Are 'Feelin' the Burn'," "Chilltown 3.0 Is Safe Again," "My Coaches Rankings," and "My Choice for America's Vote - NO"

Come back later today for the link Here's the link! Click here, follow my twitter (@whoismarkdrum) and facebook or go to my search page on cbsdetroit.com! Happy Monday!

Big Brother Season 14 Episode Six

So with the exit Willie it left the question with not only America but the houseguests, would their be an eviction this week? The answer, of course and that comes to the joy of Team Boogie. However for some of the other coaches and players it seems like they're not getting any love from Big Brother in this game. Tears have been shed finally in this game! I'm excited because that means people are starting to break and for those players that start to break it's a matter of fighting or just giving up. 


America's Vote: My Choice - Cereal & Salmon
The following three are the options for the houseguests
  • Cereal & Salmon
  • Garbanzo Beans & Giblets
  • Lima Beans & Lemons
Vote on CBS.com/bigbrother on which one you'd like to give to the houseguests who are the "Have Nots" for the week.

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Again if you want to read more, click here come back later today to get the linkOr go to http://detroit.cbslocal.com/tag/mark-drum/ or keep a look out on my twitter or facebook page.

Big Brother Season 14 Episode Four


Here is what I'll be discussing in this entry:

The twists keep coming in this game. You’ve got a mutiny going on, a burglar, redemption and another twist for the coaches. This just ending week one. I don’t know about you but I’m definitely pumped to see where this season continues to go. 

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Come back later here  Click here to check it out or go to http://detroit.cbslocal.com/ or follow them via twitter or facebook.

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In other news, I auditioned for this year's Farmington Founders Festival, Farmington Idol. I didn't get selected to be in the finals this year however I enjoyed the experience. Plus I know it's really their loss for not having my singing ability.

For those of you who are following me on twitter the song I choose was "I'll Be" by Edwin McCain then found out after intermission the judges needed to have a sing off between four contestants and I was one of them. My "sing off" song was "I Want It That Way" by the Backstreet Boys.





Anyways here are clips to those songs. Enjoy!

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Big Brother Season 14 Episode Two


Hello BB14 fans and viewers...if you're reading this, Thanks! I hope you enjoy my recap of tonight's episode. Also if you're a fan of the show and don't like spoilers, fair warning SPOILERS WILL BE MENTIONED!

It was really sad to see Jodi. If you haven't gotten a chance check out Jodi's exit video with Julie Chen on cbs.com. However Dan, their coach and Michigan naitive, made it clear he wants to make sure his houseguests stay in the game and thought having a good connection (both Kara & Danielle) would be better than Jodi who was on the outs with connecting with his two other houseguests' on his team.

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Back to the show itself.

Willie is HOH, thanks to his coach  Britney. Janelle, what a SMART woman. Granted this is her THIRD time in the Big Brother house, so obviously she knows a thing or two. Plus Big Brother Competitions Queen. Really smart to talk with Britney the winning coach of the team that won HOH. Was anyone really surprised when Willie finally admitted to being Russell's brother from Survivor? I know I wasn't. I would be careful because that's gonna come bite you back later on.


I forget that everyone's perception of past houseguests are what they've done in the past. Yes, I would agree that both Dan & Boogie were manipulators but it's part of the game. But way to bring "Girl Power," it's smart however don't get to overconfident. I really enjoyed what Frank had said during the show about not letting the coaches control of the game. Which I ABSOLUTELY agree! They're coaches. Do players always listen to them? NO! But when they do it can go really good or really bad. I just hope that these houseguests remember they're playing the game as much as these coaches are too. Don't become puppets of their own game.

Ian's little segment was a bit quirky and odd, but go figure he's the youngest contestant this season as well as a big fan of the show. Of course he's going to be a bit off. Isn't anyone who's willing to be on the show? Willie, don't act all macho sitting in that HOH room, remember that only lasts for A WEEK!

In revealing a new competition to the game, it was only a matter of time when they'd involve the coaches. But it definitely was a "game changer" as they'd like to say in Big Brother lingo. I really thought Dan throwing the competition was a good move but also a bad one at the same time. Yes it creates a big target on your other player, but WHY WOULDN'T YOU NOT WANT TO WIN?!? You're risking $100,000 just to throw the competition so you look like you're houseguests are floaters and not threats?!? What was surprising was Boogie beating Janelle. However it wasn't surprising by his decision to save Ian. That was also a good/bad move. Why save a houseguest nobody likes when your supposedly strong houseguest you have confidence in, Frank may be on the chopping block. Also you're building Ian's ego and his Big Brother Fanatic of you. Chilltown 3.0 (which has been dubbed by Janelle) won't be good as the original. 

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For just a fan of the show who doesn't subscribe to the live feeds (did I mention I graduated college last year and now paying for my student loans) so getting that opportunity to be a "fly in the wall" isn't happening. So I'm really basing off this from watching the episodes CBS airs which you know they have to edit A LOT of footage as well as prepare segments. Which if you think it's all easy, just imagine trying to cram for a big test and the test is in mere hours when you have information that it will cover since the beginning of time. That's what the folks at Big Brother have to do every week for three episodes. Reality TV is tough but also something that can be easy to start getting into a rhythm. You'll know what happens...someone wins HOH, people get nominated, coach saves one of their houseguests, Power of Veto (POV), POV ceremony, someone get's evicted and then the cycle will start again. But it's that footage in between, the interactions with other contestants is what makes the show and the stories they tell about themselves. 

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Currently this is where I rank the coaches;

  1. Janelle - For the fact she's wanting to target the other coaches to go home. She's playing the game as she should but also building her allegiance. 
  2. Britney - Having picked the right players and them winning HOH.
  3. Dan - Even though he didn't win the Coaches' Competition, he's still above the game play of person below. 
  4. Boogie - Yes it's a social game, but watch your mouth. You may be doing more harm than good. Also it took you TWO times to actually win Big Brother...just saying. Also does Boogie remember Jun (Big Brother Season Four winner?) because last time I checked she cooked for the house and she got pretty far...*cough* actually winning her season *cough*

The following three are who I think are playing the game well:

  1. Willie - You won HOH, good job, for having a coach that wants you to do well in the game. But remember those who come strong in the beginning need to keep that momentum into next week, when your safety is on the line since you will be ineligible to be next week's HOH.
  2. Frank - You talk the talk now can you play it? It's good to be the good guy but that only lasts so long before you're going to have to make smart moves and start aligning with people you can rely on. Obviously Willie may not be someone you can rely on.
  3. Kara - Being Dan's top pick and the fact the coaches (Britney & Janelle) are talking about you and want you out, well done. The good girl persona is working, but just like Frank you've got to start making moves. Those who get nominated first should realize they need to light the fire to fuel them up to play the game. Plus you haven't really talked with Willie? That can be good and bad. Bad since you're up for elimination, Good that you're not kissing the HOH. I personally DO NOT LIKE FLOATERS!

The following three aren't doing enough to play the game

  1. Ian - You got lucky being saved...Now hopefully he'll do something about not being a "Creep" to the other houseguests
  2. Joe - Cooking is a good thing, but share the food and start some conversations. 
  3. Jen - If your coach is saying you're good at your social game but is throwing you under the bus (i.e. Telling Dan that if he had to evict someone who his choice was) that's not a good sign of your gameplay.

And the following are what I like to call, ”Floaters," you may be asking what is a "Floater," well they're people who like to just go with whatever the majority goes with. You know not think for themselves and just follow as oppose to leading. These people haven't shown me either being a good or bad game plays:

  1. Wil - PLAY YOUR OWN GAME! PLEASE! Don't FLOAT! SINK OR SWIM!
  2. Jojo - You can deal with Villans? ::sigh:: ok sure we'll see. Just keep nodding your head but remember that you're FLOATING and not playing a game! Change that!
  3. Ashley - If people are calling you an airhead, that's not a good thing.
Wild Cards are Shane & Danielle because they really didn't get any airplay during the show that was worth being ranked as a game player at the moment. 

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Well that raps up my recap! I hope you've enjoyed it! Please leave a comment! I'd love to hear for you and get your two cents! 

ALSO I've got some cool things in the works and hopefully I can share that with you, the blog viewers soon!

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Big Brother Season 14 Episode One

This season of Big Brother has FINALLY STARTED!

So I'm going to be blogging about this season in hopes to do the following:

  1. Get more followers to view my blog. Hopefully comments and discussion will ensue
  2. Force me to blog more
  3. Get noticed hopefully in a tasteful and good way to those in casting to be considered for next year
  4. For the fact I MET someone on the show this season
Granted with blogging it's all a matter of opinion and know that these are my opinions. I will respect everyone and anyone who wishes to respond. In return please respect my opinions. Nobody likes negativity though it's bound to happen. Let's just agree to disagree!

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Let's get started the houseguests.
First impressions are always important to me. So actually seeing everyone speak as oppose to just photos was good.

It's always interesting where they get their "key" segment. However this time it was an "invitation" and not a "key" which was impressive to see a few of them question, where their key was to the "Big Brother house." That alone should have been a clue for "expect the unexpected."

While watching the show a good friend of mine asks why are they are being chosen to enter the house. My friend isn't a fan of the show nor really has any interest in reality tv, but they put up with my obsession and we're still good friends. I responded back to them by saying it's a matter of getting a bed and then scoping out the house. Plus any Super FAN would also make note of who entered at what time. Why you ask? Because they'll use that information at a later time during competitions where your mental stamina is tested. My friend just rolled their eyes and they told me to keep watching while they did something else.

Then the TWIST (of many more to come) was revealed. PAST HOUSEGUEST would be BACK IN THE BIG BROTHER HOUSE! However they were to compete as COACHES! Which is BRILLIANT! Not only are you bringing back fan favorites, but you're also allowing them to give their insight to the game to the players. However it is still a game and those houseguests can take their coaches opinions with a grain of salt. 

I am glad to see three of the four returning houseguests. I'm a fan of Britney (Season 12), Dan (Season 10) and Janelle (Season Six & Season Seven aka All Stars). It was really great to hear about what has been going on with their lives; getting married, having a kid, etc. What was really interesting was to see how they each would choose their houseguests to coach.

So it's not a surprise when CBS likes to do some cross-overs. But this really wasn't a cross-over as to more family and their wanting to apply for a reality show which happens to be on the same network but a different competition. Big deal that Willie is Russell's relative. He's a different player.

It was disheartening to see Team Dan, lose the HOH (Head Of Household) Competition. How the coaches chose their players were interesting. In my opinion these would be my standings of how the coachers are faring:

  1. Team Britney - Due to the fact her team won the HOH competition
  2. Team Janelle - Though a bit of an odd ball group, they'll be interesting to see their game play and how Janelle will coach them.
  3. Team Dan - Though they are a "man" down as Julie Chen (aka Chenbot - a nickname from her given by viewers)  Dan tried his best to pick the best players he thought would be good for his team. I find it interesting he chose all females for his team. Time will tell how that fares
  4. Team Boogie - I enjoy the houseguests he chose, I'm just not a fan of him and his gameplay is not one I enjoy. He does make a good point of it being a social game, but that will only take you so far. I hope he doesn't bring "Chill Town" into this Big Brother House.
---------------------------------------
It was one of the more interesting first episodes in a while. I enjoyed this twist A LOT MORE than the past two. At least this time around the returning houseguests are coaches. Which I commend the producers and those in production on the show for doing. It's definitely following with reality tv trend (i.e. X Factor, The Voice, etc). Not that it's a bad thing but hey if it's working on one show it's bound to work for another right? 

All in all I'm looking forward to the rest of my summer watching this show! =]

The Voice 1st Week Eliminations

To recap here were my predictions:

Team Blake:
1. Jordis Unga
2. Jermaine Paul
3. RaeLynn
4. Erin Willet
5. Naia Kete (Saved - Since Blake loves her "unique" voice)
6. Charlotte Sometimes

Team Christina
1. Jesse Campbell
2. Chris Mann
3. Sera Hill
4. Moses Stone (Saved - Between the bottom three of my choices)
5. Ashely De La Rosa
6. Lindsay Pavao

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And here's what really went down ***Spoiler, if you haven't seen it yet***
People who went home.


Team Blake:
Naia Kete
Charlotte Sometimes


Team Christina
Sera Hill
Moses Stone


The judges saved: Jordis Unga & Ashley De La Rosa.


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I was surprised Jordis was in the bottom, but thankfully she was saved.
And really the audience was for Ashley?!?! UGH!
She can go home! I'll predict America won't be voting for her and in the bottom AGAIN and then we'll see her go! IF not, then I don't know what they're hearing.


Overall it was a good live show!

Neglecting to blog

I have had plenty of opportunities to blog, but have I? Nope. This isn't good, but I also had a lot of things to vent out, though I wasn't sure if it was best to vent them completely through blogging.

But I'm back and really need to blog about something really important.

THE GRE!!!

I will begin taking this four hour test in less than 12 hours and will try my hardest to succeed. Though I'm already beginning to have doubts of my success and already feeling like I need to schedule my 2nd attempt to take this test. I'm thinking sometime in November, so that gives me October to continue studying and try to do better. However I am also trying to cram as much as I can too. But by cramming I'm trying to speed through the study guide book for all the hints, tips and tricks. I'm really feeling like I'm psyching myself out.

I'm going to stay positive though and get some sleep soon!

I'll probably blog more about this month maybe tomorrow?

Ok time to get back to cramming and soon sleep!

Wish me luck! =]

TV Shows Rant

So I'm kind of a reality tv show junkie and really enjoy watching some scripted shows....The downside though, I don't even have cable, so I make up watching these shows online.

Thanks to hulu and the networks the shows on website.

Reality TV Shows....

Big Brother 13, so I'm going to be honest, I've ranted about this before (earlier blog entry) and I'm still appalled that they didn't do a fresh faced cast this season. They did two thirds new and a third of alumni. I understand that some previous "houseguests" have made great tv, but come on....NEW FACES are better than the one's we've seen before for a reality tv show. It gets boring because we know their game play and it's not fair to some people who auditioned (like myself) and didn't get selected...hahaha granted didn't get past the casting call, but hey I can dream right!?!

Glee Project, I throughly enjoyed how Ryan Murphy pulled an Oprah moment, "You get a role and you  get a role, EVERYBODY (the final four) gets a role on GLEEEEEEEE!" hahahaha But I did enjoy the outcome. Wasn't too much of a fan of Lindsay. Alex was just as Ryan Murphy said, "love child of Kurt and Mercedes." Then the actual winners Damian (the Irish dude) and Samuel (the Christian Rocker) won. Which I'm happy for both winners and the two runner ups since they all got episode arcs for Glee. Who knows maybe all four will be permanent cast members.

The Challenge Rivals, if only they brought back Road Rules, I'd totally do the show. The Challege: Rivals was meh. Enjoyed the highs and lows. I'm over cliques, but it makes for great tv. Not surprised by the winners, would have liked to have seen a rookie duo win, but sadly that didn't happen.

Project Runway, I watch it because of Heidi Klum...enough said

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Scripted shows

Oddly enough all my scripted shows have been on USA Network.
Really enjoy Royal Pains, White Collar, Covert Affairs and the new series Suits. USA has done a good job with their programming. I really want to get caught up on Burn Notice but just haven't had the time...hahahaha

Shows I've rewatched this summer Avatar: The Last Airbender, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Yu-Gi-Oh! (all three generations)

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Yeah I think I have an addiction to watching TV...even though I've been also working two different jobs and studying for my GRE...

Is this what post-grad life is like!??!?

hahahaha
=]

It's August already

So by this time of the year, summer would be winding down and I'd be preparing for another year of school and RA Training...but NOT THIS YEAR!!!!

Just finished my third day of training and it was really enjoyable. A bit bittersweet, but I know that I've got more training coming up. Still learning for this job.

A few days ago I applied for another job....I GOT IT! I think of it as more of an internship but more importantly an AMAZING OPPORTUNITY!

That now puts my job count to THREE! I enjoy having a very busy schedule. But this is a new kind of busy and I'm trying to figure out how to stay positive, energetic and excited. Though I may feel a bit tired, I'm still having fun!

Also just saw another job posting for a job...may apply...may not....but most likely I'll give it a shot and see...I've got nothing to lose...besides I know when enough is enough as well as learning to give and take. So I'm really just trying to get a job(s) that will work well and I will enjoy.

I was a bit of a jerk to a friend tonight, I felt awful at the end and my friend knows I didn't really mean to hurt any feelings or cause any unnecessary drama. However a positive was they were so kind enough to give me food! They didn't want it anymore and I gladly volunteered. hahahaaha

I saw another friend today too and was glad to catch up with them. They recently lost a loved one and haven't been able to see due to giving space for time to heal as well as being busy. But good to catch up and be a ear to listen.

August will be dedicated to studying for my GRE which is now at the end of NEXT MONTH!!! AHH September seems really close...though...27 days left of August....then an additional 28 days in September...so really about less than 60 (55 days to be exact)...until my test, but going to stay positive and upbeat

=]

My mind is on overdrive

My mind seems to be really active at night and granted I should be asleep, but I can never seem to fall asleep instantly when there are some any thoughts going on in my head. From reading many articles it's good to jot down your thoughts and to come back to them later. So that's what I'm going to do...time to jot down the many thoughts going on my head right now. All while listening to my itunes library as background noise/winding down to get ready to sleep.

Thought #1
I've really been evaluating my friendships that I've developed and trying to figure out which, to continue; to pursue; as well as to try and fix or build a better friendship.

The past few months have definitely shown that I lack communication, but I feel that it's more of a fear that I'll say something wrong or that I'm just really over thinking situations or I'm creating unnecessary conflict/issues. I know that I can easily where my heart on my sleeve but I can also be very guarded. Which sounds really ironic but it's really true thought. I'm very talkative but also very private with thoughts. It takes a lot of trust from me to trust people I can effectively communicate with. There have been people that have broken my trust which has saddened me but I've learned from that mistake and have continued to better myself as a person.

A good friend of mine has said, "they'll forgive, but never forget," this statement has definitely stuck with me...in a negative way. I always seem to think of the negative in the situation. Again, I'm trying to grow as a person, but I hate to disappoint others.

Also I really want to call people and catch up with them....I need to do this or if you're reading this and we're friends (obviously we are) call me and let's catch up! hahahaha

Thought #2
I really am stressing about this whole Grad School thing. I want to make sure I'm preparing myself in the best way possible. Researching schools, which is already a big feat in itself, trying to figure out which Colleges would be best for me and what they can offer me in my growth of higher education.

The GREs are going to freak me out. I'm not the best of test takers and so I've already invested quite an amount of money to make sure I'm studying and focusing to do my best. My main task is keeping focused and actually studying; then retaining the information learned as well as implementing what I've learned into real life situations.

Statement of purpose....blah, I need to really start on writing this....I know I've said that earlier but it's definitely something I NEED to start doing too. Which also brings up getting letters of recommendations from professors/faculty/people I've had good relationships with me who want to see me continue my education and who will recommend me into graduate schools. I think I've got a good handful of people I'd be honored if they'd write a letter of recommendation for me. Hopefully they'll feel honored that I asked them.

Thought #3
I really miss a lot of hobbies right now. I've been really busy focusing on finding a job(s) and relaxing.

But I miss theatre. I miss acting, singing, directing, do something in theatre right now. However I did check out three plays from the library to read...which I haven't done yet. I also want to sign up for a dance class or two or three. But that involves time and money, which right now I don't have the money but time could easily do. However with the job searches, that may effect when I could take the class(es).

I miss running and I really want to work out, I want to get some muscle definition as well as mass on my freaking scrawny body. I'm not saying I'm not happy with my body, but I definitely would like a body that's in shape. I miss competing and doing xc races. I should really e-mail may coach randomly and see if I can attended a practice...even though it's been a few years and I could easily still look like someone who's in high school...hahaah

I really want to do a photoshoot. One for myself to get some new headshots but also take some photos for fun! I just really need to go out and take some photos. It's a possible grad degree I'm looking into so I should really start working on building that portfolio up.

I know I'll eventually get to it each of these missed hobbies, but right now I'm really trying to get a stable job(s) in tact.

Thought #4
Job search, trying to think when enough is a enough searching and be happy with the jobs I currently have.

I recently accepted an offer to start working at the Apple Store, which I'm really excited for the opportunity and look forward to the Orientation which is three days for eight hours. However since I accept the job offer, I'm going to be missing my family reunion. Which I'm sad because I haven't seen many of them in years. A sacrifice that I had to take, but I'm sure my extended family will understand.

But yeah, my job search is still going. I need to make sure I have a job(s) that will help pay off debt (credit card & soon Student Loans). Plus I want to save up for Grad School/moving and for a car. I really need to get my own car to own. It's the next "grown up" purchase I need to do along with getting an apartment.

Thought #5
I want to TRAVEL! Like really bad! I want to go overseas experience different cultures visit different continents and countries. ::sigh::

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Those are pretty much what's going on in my mind currently...lots of rambling but this had definitely helped. Therapeutic and just good to keep doing something I said I wanted to do on my "Summer To-Do List."

I'll post a blog entry of some pictures soon. I really like how most of the months I've averaged seven entries. This is entry no. six, so I definitely need to get another one in before the end of the month. Which is totally do-able!

=]

Blogging Mood

I'm in the mood to blog...about what...that's a good question....

Let's see I could start off with what happened today....nothing too exciting...I did however went to work today for a closing shift and that was interesting. Then went over to my friend Courtney's house to hang for a bit and drop something off.

Courtney and her family were watching, "Merlin," the NBC show that didn't work for the US but now is going into Season for in the UK on BBC. Interesting show....from the two-ish episodes I had watched.

My day was kinda boring...but that's how it goes for a post-college undergraduate still trying to find a "Grown Up" job. Though I do enjoy the current job I have, but I need something more fulfilling.

-------

Summer has been fun so far! I've truly enjoyed my time back home, even with it's ups and downs; pros and cons, it's home.

Did some random shots of stuff around Courtney's house, thought they were cool and wanted to share them on here...


I throughly enjoy the "toy camera" feature on my digital camera...It does my photoediting I want done for me for photos I want to look a little vintage and getting a different point of view.

---------

I'm a reality junkie...I admit it...thought this isn't a surprise to my friends, they know I like watching them and know maybe too much about them...hahahha I've even auditioned for some. Yeah I'm weird like that.

Current reality shows watching...
Big Brother 13 and So You Think You Can Dance 8

BB13 - This is pretty much the season of the returning houseguest....the past two weeks it's been Alum who've won HOH (Head Of Household) competitions and obviously nominating the new people. It's kinda annoying...I actually applied for this season and I definitely feel like I've got WAY MORE PERSONALITY then some of these characters on the show. But I could always apply next year...lol

SYTYCD8 - I like how they stuck back to the original format of the top 20, however Nigel (one of the "resident judges"/executive producer) made some horrible choices for eliminations. Though I'm happy with the top five girls, the boys are all kinds of messed up. Ricky and Mitchell should have peaced out! I would have liked Chris and Nick/Alexander in the top five guys. But these are just my opinions. Nigel, "MUST KNOW" what America wants right...*cough* RATINGS *cough*....just FYI Nigel Ricky and Mitchell will be getting the low votes from America...just watch!

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My grandma (mom's side) is here again with us! I picked her up while babysitting my brother form the airport. I liked how I planned driving and getting their just as she walked outside to the International Arrivals pick up area. Great timing! Even though my mom told me I should have left just as I was getting there. Going with my gut won! Plus it was good to see my grandma again!

=]

Road Trippin Adventure

So its my best friend Courtney's Birthday this weekend and we went and picked up her boyfriend, Dennis and her other friend Garrek from East Lansing, which by the way I haven't been to since my Junior year of high school.

Anyways made the trip over and when we had past a certain city we completely lost our radio station we had been listening to and were torchered by country music stations. Luckily on the drive back we put on Pandora from Garrek's phone.

Then finally got back to Courtney's house in time for dinner. I then learned how to play Settlers and all four of us played. Its an interesting strategy game and we played two games. The first was a decent length of time but the last game took forever.

Finally after the last game, was getting dropped off home and to my surprise was locked out.I didn't bring my keys thinking I'd be fine getting back inside but no. not sure if my parents are trying to teach me something or they thought I would be staying the night over Courtney's house.

Anyways left a message on the parents cell phone as oppose to call the house and waking everyone up. Left a message and headed back to Courtney's.

But lesson learned bring house key with me next time...lol

Reevalutating

Looking back on my summer "to do" list

  • Study for the NEW GRE
  • Work Out
  • Audition, Audition, Audition
  • Get job(s)
  • Blog more on markdrum.blogspot.com
  • Hang out with friends
  • ROAD TRIP!?!?
  • Find a job(s)

Let's see I've worked out (last week during ITF); I've been looking at flash cards for the NEW GRE, Auditions have been on the back burner...I got a job, but still looking. Road Trip is in the works (shhh don't tell...lol) and I have been making an effort to hanging out with friends. Oh and blogging more, which I feel has been working. Granted most of the post have been within this past week, but it's better than nothing right?!?!

All in all I feel like I'm getting my summer "to do" list going. I would still love to actually work out more and so hopefully I'll get my butt into gear with that. I really need to start hitting the study book for the NEW GRE and actually pic a date in which to take the test. Auditions need to happen, but I just need to find out when they all are...I seem to have missed a good number but hopefully I'll be diligent and not miss much. I need a better paying job, but doesn't everyone??!? But in all seriousness I do and hopefully my resume & cover letter are doing it's job...if not I'm going to have to edit them some more.

So within the past few weeks I've done some HEAVY thinking and I need to be honest. I NEED TO STOP OVER THINKING! I just need to let go and go with the flow. I get so wound up over analyzing things that I stress myself out over nothing. However I'm still learning and growing. Change can/can not be good. But I'm hoping this change will be for the better! 

I'm really looking forward to the next month, JULY! Which is actually the MOST BORING month where I work because it's always slow in general. Not that my job is boring but the month itself...lol if that makes any sense. Anyways...I'm going to stay positive and rough it out! 

Doing a lot of deep thinking and taking time for me! Hopefully I'll find what I'm looking for and the answers I need! =]